Out the Comet's Ass

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Thursday, December 03, 2009

It's Not My Imagination

Well, the newspaper has included a story about how the tap water is being polluted by overflow from the sewers up in the towns North of where I am but it includes no information in the towns south of those towns. There's no reporting on how widespread the problem is. Yet, when you walk down the street you can smell extremely pungeant food smells coming out from under the sidewalks. Apparently, according to the West Bay Sanitary District anyone who drinks the water or bathes in it is exposing themselves to "Chemicals, bacteria and viruses, 'posing a serious risk to fisheries, wildlife habitat and human health.'"

People still manage to remain blissfully unaware. Human nature is so unbelievable.

Apparently the people where I live are completely oblivious to the fact that brown gunk is coming out of their water. If you drape a white towel over a faucet and let it drip slowly for a couple of hours you can make a really cool radiating pattern of brown grease on the towel. It even stinks like whatever cuisine has just been dumped down the drain.

Yet, I can find absolutely no laundromat to clean my clothes within 30 miles of where I live. I have been buying bottled water to brush my teeth with and to wipe myself off with. The H1N1 Virus is nothing compared with what this has the ability to turn into. Not understanding where the smell was coming from I have been gassing everything madly with Febreze to the point that I had fevers for 2 months. Then I went down to Monterey in order to do my laundry. A 60 mile car drive in order to sit in a laundromat. This year is the year that my progressed Mercury and Venus both fall on my natal Pluto in the 4th House (same degree). I've become fascinated by how many different types of Sewers there are. There are plain "Sewer" Manhole Covers. There are "Storm Drain" Manhole Covers. And there are these weird Manhole Covers that say "Sanitary Sewer." I guess that's the Virgo conjunction. I just love the idea of saying that there is clean shit in the world. It's really Republican. Howard Hughes would agree with me.

I realize that not everybody is as lucky as I was to be raised by my Amazing Irish Jewish Mother who was constantly screaming: "If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times, Don't throw the God Damned grease down the drain! You'll clog up the plumbing." You should have heard her screaming about keeping fingers out of electrical sockets. The first thing I ever said was "Don't Do That!"

People, read this and quit flushing grease down the drains. Write to your local congressmen and complain. Isn't this amazing? Home prices are among the highest in the country here and the people who live in them are among the filthiest. Come visit the Silicon Valley but be sure to get your Dengue Fever shots in advance.


Sorry I'm being rude but this is just too damn much.

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