Out the Comet's Ass

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Thursday, November 08, 2007

All Hands

Mercury is all hands, whether manually dexterrosing those pliers around the Water Heater as it explodes water all over the Carpet or while kicking down the Door of a Public Restroom to exit without handling the scabbous, pussy door handle like a germophobic Virgo. A while ago, I read through one of those list type internet articles about this subject. This particular list claimed to disclose 12 of the germiest places in the Country, but it was sort of a trick catch line; the article only actually listed 10 places and they weren't really places in the country at all, mostly places in your home. (No link to the article either). I do remember that the #1 armpit of the Nation was your kitchen sink. They said that the average Kitchen Sink in America has more germs than the average toilet in America. I know that we Americans think that our shyte doesn't stink but this is ridiculous. Isn't It???? What we put into our mouths is dirtier than poo. Boy, that was a weird article but I believe every word of it, they actually provided Germ Counts for each filthy thing they listed and you can't argue with the numbers.

But, now I'm confused. Was my Mother washing my Mouth out with soap when I was a kid because of what I said or because of what I ate? cruddy joke but just can't help myself, heheh.

What I'm trying to say here is that the article said that about 80 percent of the germs that you pick up are transmitted from off your hands. (Germs are ruled by Pluto, by the way, according to Bills) I think there's something to this. I mean, I can't put a percentage point to the cases but, man, the things we grab with our hands. The hands go everywhere, like rabid bats screeching through the night. The feet don't have to do that kind of probing. The article compared amounts of germs found on door knobs and toilet seats and sinks.

So, here comes, this is really dumb: hands are ruled by Gemini which is ruled by Mercury. And Hygiene is ruled by Virgo which is ruled by Mercury. Mercury is doing its own self in here.

And here's a solution. And it's really far-out. Maybe if we rearranged the signs of the Zodiac so that Gemini and Virgo trine each other in the Horoscope rather than square each other we could eradicate Communicable Diseases from the World by 80 percent. They say that what you think is what you are, after all, so we should fix these problems within the general circle of things.



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