What the Hell Was He Thinking?

Story in the news last week about a guy who identifies as a woman and who pretended to be a doctor, a plastic surgeon, but who really belongs to an underground plastic surgery ring. This guy/gal, performed butt enhancement surgeries on women by injecting them with a special spackle made of cement, superglue, and flat-tire sealant.

There you go, no matter how hard you try to dress the guy up like a gal, you just can't take Home Depot out of his stupid sorry ass. There was no mention of Duct Tape in the article; maybe that's just "too 90's."

Thinking about this makes me want to throw up. It also made me feel mean and want to look the freak's birth date up in the cloud. This is probably not correct birth date, but I'm putting it out there for anyone who's curious. The chart is pretty amazing.

Phoney Dr.

July 10, 1992 Carteret, NJ

Sun 19 Cancer; Moon Scorpio or Sagittarius; NN 1 Capricorn

Sun 19 Cancer c. Venus 27 Cancer. Mommy and Beauty.

The Sun-Venus conjunction is opposing Uranus 15 Cap Rx - Neptune 18 Cap Rx. Sun-Venus opposite Neptune has overly idealistic view points of women, especially when Sun and Venus are in the sign of the Mother, Cancer. Add Uranus in on the mix and you've got total weirdness. This is why we need to add art class back into the classroom. This chart would thrive in art class. It's ok to be dumbed than shit in art class, it's actually desired. Creativity comes from making mistakes and veering from the norm, just not in this way.

Grand Fixed Square between Mercury-Mars-Chiron-Saturn-Pluto: Mercury 15 Leo-Chiron 11 Leo opposes Saturn 18 Aquarius Rx. Square Mars 19 Taurus opposing Pluto 21 Scorpio Rx. That's showing some real stress coming from childhood.

Commentary on this thing could go on for eons. Mercury shows the thinking process. Well, he got caught because of a "surgery" he performed in May 2010. That's Saturn Return stuff. Mercury c. Chiron doesn't help. Progressed Mercury in Rx doesn't help either.

He's not the only one out there. That's scary. If this chart is accurate, the 1 NN on the AP of Capricorn brought this guy out before the public. Unfortunately, not until after the Saturn-Jupiter-Uranus-Pluto t-square hit it for the last 2 years.

In Which I Take a Looksie at the 2012 Thing, Or at Least a Part of It

The U.S. right now is having a Saturn Return. Why are countries always bombing other countries during their Saturn Return?

This is a reminder (to me) that the U.S. Saturn is at 15 Libra (H10) and is in a square with Sun 14 Cancer (H7) and is opposing Chiron 21 Aries. The House placements are for what I seem to remember as the Sibley Chart with the Sagittarius Ascendant, give or take a couple of degrees.

U.S. of A.

July 4, 1776 5:12 pm Philadelphia, PA

So I'm still trying to catch on to the 2012 panic attack thing. That's when I believe the Earth will be lining up with the Galactic Center. And some other stuff.

What I just noticed the other day are the Solar Arcs. That's when the planets are all moved forward about one degree per along with the progression of the Sun. On Dec. 21, 2012. This is a good way to begin with this chart because it really lights up the natal planets in a super duper hysterical way.

At that point Solar Arc Pluto will be on top of natal Neptune at 23 Virgo, and Lilith will be close by. Wow, the U.S. just completely blacks out? In the Sibley Chart this occurs up in the 9th House. So public. So corrupt. At least we might get a couple of good paintings or symphonies out of it -- finally. Noel Tyl calls that aspect "Wipe Out." It will be a Beach Boys song from Hell? So either we wipe out the rest of the World or the Rest of the World wipes us out? Or this is just what happens when illegal immigration occurs from countries from 3d worlds. Bring us your greediest, your most aggressive, your least sensitive, intelligent or talented. And don't ever, never, pay taxes or nothing. And never show gratitude or grace. Just learn to use the Internet and steal from other people's accounts. Maybe it will be easy and the Afghanis will give up on their own country and come to our Country to plant their poppies. So, so pretty.

Or the Oceans wipe us out? Or become dead zones?

Or we become truly psychic beings who have stare-out contests with fish, wherein the fish win. Whalerider, anyone?

Either way, it's up at the top of the chart so people in other countries are going to be watching with baited breath, isn't fun having to have diplomatic relations with people who just want you to screw up so they can show up in your country and flush grease down the drains?

Maybe it's not all grease. Maybe some of the aliens are from other planets. Maybe we'll feed them to the fish. Either way, Stephen Hawking has already warned us about Stranger Danger so we're partially prepared. You see those big old mesmerizing Neptune-Pluto eyes and, baby, you fucking book it the hell out of there!

Imagine two spirals spiraling here.

The U.S. has a natal square from Mars in Gemini (H7) to natal Neptune. When Pluto is added that could indicate that things get a little unfriendly. One could look at which houses these planets rule to get more info but I don't like to get that involved with a chart with only a speculative Rising Sign. (Okay, okay, Mars rules the IC of the Placidus Sibley chart, Pluto rules H11 and H12, and Neptune rules Pisces which is completely intercepted in the 3d House. So, there will be territoriality issues.)

And then right there on the Descendant of the Sibley Chart Saturn will be just past conjunction with the country's natal Uranus is at 9-10 Gemini (Desc 13 Gemini?). Saturn and Uranus don't really get along well with each other in mythology. Saturn represents the Old Guard who tries to contain Uranus and Uranus represents the New Guard. And their fight is basically a total drag because it starts the Wheel on its downward turn. People will have just an inkling of why we need introverts. And why our thinkers need more depth. And why we don't have the old creative spark to get through it all the way we used to. This will happen in the sign of Gemini which rules Siblings, Neighbors, Communications, Transportation. Actually Gemini is a very creative sign with all kinds of thoughts about how to fix problems and the U.S. Uranus is trining the U.S. Saturn and the Solar Arc Uranus will be trining from its own sign of Uranus (H2).

So, Houses involved in the Sibley Chart are H2 (Banks, Money, Values, Material Objects), H6-7 cusp (Partners, Marriages, Open Enemies, Diplomacy), and H10 (Status, Ambition, Direction). Grand Trines can show Ease of Feelings, Flow. Can also show self-satisfaction and self-containment and this will manifest through mental (Air) channels of detachment, reason (wouldn't that be nice for a change?).

The other big Solar Arc conjunction is Solar Arc Venus at 28 Aquarius which is conjunct the U.S. Sibley Moon at 28 Aquarius. More detachment. That's so Age of Aquariusy. This is in the 3d House of communications, early education, neighbors, siblings, etc. Maybe there will be a big change in public schooling. Parents will write a year long excuse to stay out of class for their kids.

In the secondary progressed Chart there is a long opposition of Venus to Mars layered over the U.S. Saturn-Chiron opposition. Venus on Chiron in H4 of Sibley and Mars Rx over Saturn. In 2012 p.Moon and p. Lilith will be over natal Saturn. Oh God, that's women. Sarah Palin may really run for President. How sad.

Squaring that is natal Sun, of course, which is in a very long term conjunction with progressed Jupiter which is moving in Retrograde back towards Sun from the 8th House.

So, that Sun-Saturn-Chiron t-square is heavily lit up.

Then we look at the transits to ask why Dec. 21?

Mercury and Venus will be at 16 and 8 Sagittarius right over the Ascendant. They will be opposing natal Uranus, SA Saturn and transiting Jupiter at 9 Gemini! And Lilith will be there, Lilith is always there when something happens.

Then the Moon will at some point during the day pass over natal Chiron 20 Aries in the 4th House. This will trip off the Saturn-Sun-Chiron t-square. So there is an emphasis on 1st House: Our Identity is heavily challenged by folks who are doing their Jupiter-Saturn thing. And by coincidence, the transiting Sun and Pluto will be in the 1st House of the Sibley Chart. And Mars will be in conjunction with natal Pluto (Will) in the 2d House (Values). And that's Capricorn.

And Neptune will have just moved into Pisces, it's own sign. There will have been an Eclipse Set back in November: Nov. 13 (Total Solar) and Nov. 28 (Appulse Lunar).

Lightning Strikes 6-Story Jesus

With Uranus heavily afflicted at 1 degree Aries, the birthing point of the Astrological Wheel, I guess we all suspect that there are many among us who will be unexpectedly struck down. Lightning, Uranus' sword, would be a major reason. Anything flammable is going to be extra vulnerable.

Well, in Monroe, Ohio not even Jesus is immune. Last night a 6 story high statue of Our Lord was struck by Lightening and burnt to the ground. With Uranus conjunct Jupiter, planet that rules Churches, I suppose this makes sense. The 62-foot tall statue was built in 2004 by a local church to act as a Beacon of Hope. Providing Hope is Uranus' spiritual style of leadership.

Guess what sign was rising at the time of the strike? Yep, 1 Aquarius. That puts a flammable Venus at 1 Leo right on the Descendant conjunct the Moon in Cancer. In mythology, Venus was born of the foam in the Sea (Cancer).

Guess why Jesus burned?

Because he was made out of Styrofoam!

I ought to quit here but this just keeps getting better. Chart ruler Uranus is in conjunction to Jupiter in the 2d House of Possessions opposing Saturn in the 8th House of other people's possessions and squaring apex Sun in the 5th House. That's a t-square in the Resource Houses that finds its resolve in the empty leg which is the 11th House of Hopes and Wishes.

The Statue was called the "Touchdown Jesus" because his arms were posed the same as a Football Referee who's calling a goal. Jupiter also rules Sports Enthusiasts. In ancient Greek mythology it's actually Zeus who strikes with Thunder Bolts, I think. Maybe Uranus played Umpire. I don't know. (wrong sport?)

Lightning Strikes Down Jesus
June 14, 2010 11:15 pm Monroe, Ohio

ASC 1 Aquarius; Sun 24 Gemini (H5); Moon 29 Cancer (c.DESC); MC 24 Scorpio; NN 13 Capricorn Rx.

Story: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_lightning_strikes_jesus_statue

Cell Phone Over the Heart

Here's a classic Scorpio story.

I just read about a man who was mowing his 5 acre lawn in his tractor when suddenly he felt a big pain in his chest. He probably thought he was having a Heart Attack but it turns out that a stray bullet had shot out of the woods by his home and just happened to hit him in his chest. He had also just happened to have put his cell phone in his chest pocket and the bullet had hit him right where the phone was.

The Sun rules the Heart and Scorpio rules Death (and, ahem, Rebirth). Mercury rules Cell Phones and Mars rules Bullets. All three of these planets have been in conjunction over the past week in Scorpio. According to this story (http://www.wdsu.com/news/18020334/detail.html#-) the incident happened last Saturday (Nov. 15, 2008) when Sun,Mercury and Mars were splayed over the last half of the sign of Scorpio the Phoenix.

Don't know what time the incident occurred; Hunters and Lawn Mowers tend to wake up at the crack of Dawn. It would be interesting if this incident happened just as the Sun was rising so that Sun-Mercury-Mars would be rising on the Ascendant.

One can see how the Story has a happy ending through the aspects that this stellium makes. Mercury 18 Scorpio was in conjunction with Sun 24 Scorpio. This was hooked into a lucky Boat Shape pattern which is a string of happy sextiles held together by an opposition. In this case Saturn-Uranus were making the opposition and lucky Jupiter was filling in the other side of the sextile string. Sun-Mercury were also in aspect with Neptune (belief) and Chiron (wounding) in Aquarius (uniqueness).

The inner planets here seem to be showing the actions of the person to whom the event occurred (Cell Phone (Mercury) saves Man from Bullet (Mars)) while the Outer Planets show the events that happen to him. (Accident (Uranus), Luck (Jupiter), Security & Safety (Saturn)).

Oh, and to add to the drama, we can't forget about Pluto. Pluto rules Scorpio so one has to wonder what he was up to last Saturday. Not to disappoint, he and Venus were dancing an unaspected watoosee (i.e. conjunction by ptomlomaic aspect) over the Sadge-Capricorn cusp. That makes for an extreme event in the signs of Security and just plain old Dumb Luck.